MR. AND MBSr WHITE. 

New Series. 



No. 83. 





i 




DRAMATIC LIBRARY 



OF 



t/lcting Plays 



Printed from the Acting Copy, with Re- 
marks on the Piece ; Description of Costume ; 
Cast of Characters; Exits and Entrances; 
Relative Positions ; and correctly marked with 
the whole of the 

as performed in the 
JLondon and wtmeriean Theatres* 

WITH 

SPIRITED ENORAVINGS. 

PHILADKLFHIA : 
FRED. TURNER, PUBIilSHER ; 

Sold by Turner and Fislier,' 

NEW YORK, & PHILADELPHIA. 




^ujrncr's JBtamatfc arbrars. 

MR. &, MRS. 

PETER WHITE 

A FARCE, 

IN 



BY R. J. RAYMOND, 

Author of Robert the Devil. Old Oak Tree, Ballance of 
Comfort^ P. S. — Come To Dinner, Chemj Bounce, 
Deuce U in Her, Sfe. 

CORRECTLY PRINTED FROM THE MOST APPROVED 
ACT1.\G COPY 

WITH A DESCRIPTION OF THE COSTUME, CAST OP THE 

CHARACTERS, ENTRANCES AND EXITS, RELATIVE 

POSITIONS, AND THE WHOLE OF THE 

STAGE business; 

To which are added, 

PROrERTlES AND DIRECTIONS, AS FER^ORMl.D IN THg 

AMERICAN THEATRES. 



TURNER 8t FISHER, 

15 NORTH SIXTH STREET, PHILADELPHIA ; 

AND 74 CHATHAM STREET NEW YORK. 



DRAMATIS PERSON JC, 

5s^ . p 5 Mr. Williams. 

Major Pep^.r, - - . ^ Mr. Lewis. 

Frank Bnon. - ~ - Mr. Hemming. 

Pfter White, - - - - Mr. Ox berry. 

Widovo While, - • - Miss Novello. 

Mrs. Wldte, .... Mrs. F. Matthews. 

T-.,, n ^ ^ 5 Mrs. Keeley. 

lulty Clever, . - . - ^ ^.^^ g^^^^,; 



COSTUME. 

Major pepper— Dark blue military frock coat, 
white trowsers, cap, and stick. 

FRANK — Modern frock coat, white trowsers, and rid- 
jiifr whip. 

PETER WHITE— Brown short tailed coat, white 
waistcoat, nankeen trowsers, short gaiters, small Opera 
crush hat, white cravat, tied with large bow. 

WIDOW WHITE— Plain white dress. Second dress. 
Dark blue ridinar habit, blue cap, riding whip. 

MRS. WHITE— White muslin dress over a pink petti- 
coat, fashionable bonnet with two large feathers, green veil 
boa, very small parasol. 

KirtY CLOVER— Coloured chitz gown, white muslin 
apron, white cap with coloured ribbon. 



/i79? 




^tM 



V 



/ 



MH. A]^^I> MRS. PETER 

1¥IIITE. 

SCENE. — Richmond Hill^ with a Bird's-eye view of the 
Thames, windii-ig through the distant Countiy. To thfi 
right, a small, Cottage. To the left a small Villa or Cot- 
tage Orne, projecting somewhat on the'Stage with a practi- 
cable door and Casement. In the background, to the left, 
a practicable sloping hill. — Morning. 

Enter Frank Brown and Kitty Clover, frorr the Cot- 
tage, R. H. 

Franli. Nay, my dear Kitty, consider 

Kit. I do consider — the consequences, Mr. Brovv;i ; an 1 
as my old master, Squire Bramble, of Tantivy Hill, Somer- 
setshire, used to say to I — " Consequences, Kitty, should 
always be considered"— So I do think it would be very 
wrong of I to disturb Mrs. White so early, seeing that she 
be come down from Lunnum lo Richmond for change of 
air, and has t-iken that pretty cottage, opposite mine, on 
purpose that I should be near her. — Besides, why should I 
disturb her? you bean'ta relation of hers — [Sisnificantly. 

Frank, 'lis the utmost consequence that I should speak 
with her immediately, and if you really love her, Kitty 

Kit. Ah ! that I do, dearly ! Wern't we litlle girls to- 
gether when my mother was housekeeper to her fttther, old 
Squire Bramble ? and didn't I come up with her to Lunnum 
after his death, and remain in her service till I got married 
and settled here at Richmond, where I take in children to 
nurse, while my good man goes a farming; and ?orry 



4 MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

enougii I were to leave her, for she led a sad lifu wiih the 
rich old man she were obligated by her faiher's will to 
tuarry, because the olJ gentlemen happened to be schoolfel- 
lows. I were to have nursed their first offspring, but were 
disappointed, for what witli the gout, and the rhumatiz, and 
his friend's jokes at his 'spousing a wife young enough to 
ho his grand-daughter, the poor old gentleman died in the 
honey moon ! 

Frank. Hal ha! and thus was your charming mistress 
loft a widow at ninetten ; but not, I hope, with a distaste 
ior matrimony. 

Kit. La! bless you, no, sir ! she a'nt had experience 
rnough yet ! (archly) But as j-he be now free to choose for 
herself, she o-Ji^ht to have a husband of her own age — 

Frank. Capable of ap[)reciating her virtues and talents. 

Kit. Kind. — 

Frank. Affectionate. 

Kit. And complaisant, never saying no 

Frank. Yes. 

Kit, When she says yc--. — 

Frank. No ! in short, Kitty, a good Imsband. 

Kit. Which be as scarce to find 

Frank. As a good wife. Kilty! 

Kit. No, more scarcer! I be bound to speak up for my 
sex. you know I 

Frank. Well then, Kitty, I know just such a one. 

Kit. (Quicldp) What, a good husband, sir ? 

Frank. {Sniiling) Yet=. 

Kit. La! do pray show him to T, sir — (wUfi great naiv 
ete) I be so fund o* curiosities I {Frank laughs.) Where be 
he, sir? 

Frank. Near at hand. 

Kit. (aside.) Yes, at my elbow, or I'm much mi.-taken! 
{aloud. ) And have I ever seen him, sir.? 

Frank. Often. 

Ait. (archly) La ! you don't say so, sir ! Stay, now I 
ihink on't, he be youn^-. — 

Frank. About my own age. 

Kit. Tolerably good looking 



MR. AMD MRS. PETKR WillTE. » 

Frank. (Arranging his Cravat.) Ahem ! 

A'(^ And he comes to Richmond every day to my cot- 
tage, where he has hired a room ior change of air, as he 
says 

'Frank Exictly (Smiling.) 

Kit. And liis name be— Mr. Francis Brown Esq. Ha I 
ha! you be found out and discovered, you see, sir, (Laugh, 
'rig.) 

Frank. Ha! ha! why Kitty, you're as shrewd as a Lord 
Mayor. 

Kit. Come, that be no great compliments neither! but 
I can see as fir into a mill stone as my neighbours; so you 
may as well confide in me at once, sir. 

Frank Well, then, to be candid, Kitty I do love the 
chaming widow, and rejoice to add tliat our affection i? 
reciprocal. 

Kit. Rici-pro ! oh ! I mider.-^tand ! she gives you as good 
as you bring — well, then, the way to church be as smooth 
as a riiit road. 

Frank. 'Sdeath, no ! there's a pliguy stumbling block 
in the path, in the shape of a peppery old uncle of mine, 
on whom I am depiindeot, and who is a determined enemy 
to wedlock. 

Kit. Ah! those crusty old bachelors I As my master 
used to say, "an old bachelor is like"' ■ 

Frank. Oil the contrary, he is a Widower of ih^ee wivesl 

Kit. Three [ v\hit a Blue Beard! Did he marry 'em for 
looe or money, sir ? 

Frank. Fur the laiter, I imagine, from the miserable life 
he led with them. 

Kil. Ser\^e him right, the old cormorant. 

Frank. You now perceive the necessity of my immedi- 
ate ly seeing the widow ; my uncle will arrive this morning 
fcom Devonshire, and if I am not in town to receive him 

[Here the Widow is heard singing inside the cottage l. 

H.] Hark ! 'tis she ! 

Kit. That be her sweet voice sure enough, — don't make 
your heart beat, sir 7 

Frank. Djuble quick time, Kitty ! 



b MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

Enter. Wjdow White, singing from a sheet of Music 
iDhich she carries in her hand. Kitty enters the Widoic^s 
Cottage. 

IVid. {Singing. Lai la! la! a very charrr.ingf compo- 
sition indeed ! [Sees Frank.] Bless me, you here already, 
Frank? Why you must have been "Z7/j in the morning 
early,''^ as the old song^ says ! 

Frank. In truth, Clarisa, I hav'nt slept all night, 

Wid. A visit from '■'Queen Mab," vulgarly called the 
^'Ni^ht ilfarc," perhaps [Laughingly.] 

Frank. Yes, in the shape of a respectable elderly gen- 
tleman! 

IVid. Ha! I understand, your Uncle I and is he become 
civilized, or as much averse to matriisiony as ever. 

Frank: More than ever, if I may judge from his last let- 
ter, in which he threatens to cashier me, if 1 disobey him 
[Emphaiicaliy.] But he shall find me as obstinate as him- 
self. — Lst him disinherit me—l'll marry you wihout a shil- 
ling in my pocket, upon my soul I will Clarissa. [She 
laughs ] No, no, I mean if you had not a shilling in the 
world. — 

l\id. I have already told you that, happy as I should be 
to be called your loife, I will not consent to purchase the 
title at the price of your uncle's displeisure ; foi" despite 
iiis eccentricities, he has, you confess, b^en ever most kind 
to you. 

Frank. And you love me, Clarissa? 

IVid. Can I give you a stronger proof of my attachment ? 

Frank. Yes. 

Wid' How? 

Frank. By allowing me to introduce you to him. 

Wid. Wherefore, pry'thee ? 

Frank. Let liim but see and hear you. 

Wid. {smilei)ig) You pretend I should make a convert 
of him— Flatterer! 

Frank. Nay, I'.-n certain of if [EmphaticaUy and 
rapidly.] I present you to him, he is struck by your beauty, 
and will consent to our union, and cirry us down to his 
estate in Devonshire, where we shall live like "Love among 
the Roses." 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHlTK. 7 

]Vid, A very captivating extempore romance, indeed I 
you are for illustrating '■'Darby and J(/a?i," I see! But 
'twill be time enougli to settle these matters when we are 
married — if we ever should be, ha ! ha ! 

Enter Kitty from the Widow's Cottage, 

Kit. I've been helping Susan, ma'am, and breakfast be 
ready — I've laid it for two' ma'am. 

Wid. {Smiling.) For two, Kitty— wherefore ? 

Kit. (Archly.) Because you be so hospitable, ma'am; 
and as Mr. Brown has rode all the way from Lunnun this 
morning, I thought as how — [Widow laughs. 

Frank. "Sweet Kitty Clover," your attention is praise- 
worthy. But no ceremony, Clarissa, I beg — I shall be 
perfectly satisfied with Bachelor's fare! 

Wid. (Laughing) Oh ! the Bread and the Cheese are 
quite at your disposal ; but the third article can be pur- 
chased only at the price of your liberty. 

Frank. Secure my hand then, and make me your priso- 
ner for life! [Exit with WidoYf, into cottage, l. h. 

Kit. (Laughingly) Bachelor's fare ! Bread and Cheese 
and Kisses! oh my — [Looking after them.] Ah they'll 
make a comfortable couple — not like Mr. and Mrs. White, 
the parents of the baby I be nursing — They be always 
quarrelling about the brat. Mr. White be so proud of 
being a Father, that he'd willingly proclaim it to ail the 
world by beat of drum ; while his wife wishes nobody to 
know she ho married. By the bye, she be a namesake of 
my dear young missus, the widow; but la! no more like 
her than Mr. Brown be like Mr. White. I expect the 
loving couple to day from Lunnun to see their offspring. 
Heigho ! I feci rather melancholic and musical this morn- 
ing. 

SONG — KITTY. 

To the fields I carry my milking can, 

All in a morning early, 
And there I met with a smart young man, 

Who vow'd he lov'd me dearly. 
I made him a curtsy, he made me a bow, 
He kiss'd nae, and promised to marry, I row ; 



8 MR. AND MBS. PETER WHITF. 

I wish that youngr fellow was with me just novp. 

On a May day morning early ! 
I strive to forget him, but all in vain, 

On a May day morning early ! 
And if I never should see him again, 

'Twould break my heart, or nearly! 
I can't bear the sight of a sheep or a cow ! 
1 want to get married, yet cannot tell how, 
I wish that young fellow was with me just now, 

On a May day morning early! 

{A horn is heard without.) That be the omnibu?. [Ascends 
the stage and looks out l. h.] And there be Mr. and Mrsu 
White sure enough, crawling up the hill — I must run and 
put a clean cap on the baby. [Exit into coitage. 

Peter White appears v. e. r. h. on the hill carrying « 
Child^s drum, a wooden horse, a small bundle, and his loife^s 
Boa, ha7,giiig over his shoulder. 

Pet. (As he enters.) Isn't it hot! I'm all over forovsl 
[Turns and speaks off.] Take it easy, my dear Clemmy — I'd 
have made the driver bowl us up the hill, but he appeal'd 
to my humanity for his hosses sake! and certainly fifteen 
inside, bfside himself and the cad, is no joke in the dog 
days for the poor //animals. 

Enter Mrs-. White carrying a very small open Parasol, 
and fanning herself with her handkerchief — she is dressed 
vulgarly^fine, and speaks affectedly. 

Mrs. W. The saints be praised, we are up at last! 

Pet. Yes, as Douglas says. [Throws himself into an atii- 
ivde and declaims. 

"" The hjU they climb'd, and halting at its top, 
" Of more than mortal height, towering-, they seem'd 
" An host jF/angelic clad in burning /iarms." 

Mrs. W. Again, Mr. White, after my strict conjunc- 
tions I [They descend. 

Pet. It's the force of habit, my love. I can't help now 
and then quoting certain passages which solisited sucU 
applause, when I was a Hamcteur i/uclpr at the Pfivat* 
Theatre in Ranter Street 



ilR. AND MRS. PEt£R WHITE- • 

Mrs. W. (^Laughing contemptuously.) Rubbage ! 
a Tragedian with such a figure — ridiculous! 

Pet. Why I must own my friends said it was belter 
suited to low comedy than high tragedy. 

Mrs. W. This force of habit as you call it, is constantly 
exposing you to ridicule — Remember your conduct in the 
Omnibus to day when you sat along side o' that young 
woman. 

Pet. I only tip'd her a bit o' Romeol [Laughing.] Oh, 
ah! when I seized ho'd of the elderly gentleman in the bob 
wig, exclaiming with Wirginius — *'My Child, my child : 
give me back my child." — I realy couldn't help il, my dear 
— ''Tvvas a sudden burst of riatur, for I was thinking of 
our dear little /foffspring. 

Mrs. W. You may think of it as much as you pleasp, 
Mr. White, but I'll trouble you not to proclaim our mar 
riage to all the world. You know how much it concern 
our interest to keep it a secret, especially from my old 
maiden aunt, who, averse to matrimony herself, promises 
to leave me all her property, provided 1 remain single. 

Pet. \Yhy, certainly, the mopusses is a consideration , 
for tlie sake of our /im/aR(j«e Aefr ! By the bye, my dear, 
talking of relations what is become of your cousin, Mr. 
Augustus Brown, the Dandy Perfumer, as lie was called, 
who I never saw, but who I'm told used to visit you anony- 
fnonsly, during my absence, when I was a courting you? 

Mrs. W. (Sentimentally.) 'Tis long since I have beheld 
that interesting youth, whose flattering attention and 
presents of Eau de Cologne excited your absurd jealousy ! 
[Eviphasising the loord Cologne,] 

Pet. Jealousy! ridiculous? what, after the advice I 
gave myself ia Ligo— [Declaims.] "Beware of Jealousy I 
it is the green eyed lobster which dnh make the meat it 
feeds on." tia 1 ha ! Jealous indeed, of a dandy perfumer 
—ridiculous — (.4s/f/c) If I had caught him tho', I vvoul . 
have //annihilated hitn. 

Mrs. W. Peter, do you love me ? [Sentimentally, leaning 
on his shoulder.] 

Pet. (Tragically.) Love you, Clementina? — I should 
think so ! 

B 



10 MR. AND MIIS. PETKR WHITE. 

Bits, W, Promise me then to conceal our union — Will 
yc\i,-dcar Peter ? [Caressing liim. 

Pet, Insinualing Clemmy-— But how lung, think you, 
t^hall 1 be obliged to consolidate in my bosom tliose paretal 
iceiings which are ready to burst forth whenever 1 tliink 
of our "i/infant bud of early bsauty," as the poet says ? 

BIrs. TV. Not long, Peter; my aunt is very old and very 
(■ropsical. 

Pet. Well, then, I'll wait till she drops off I 

Mrs. VV. Ah ! [Stntimeiitally] now you talk and look 
as when you cuiue a courting me on Priairose hill I Do 
you remember that happy lime, Pcier ? 

PcU Do I?— Don't 1! 

MEDLEY DUKT. — PETER AND WRS. WHITE. 

PETER. — Am — "Y'/ie Cuuracha.'" 
Oh, remember the time when a courting I came, 

In hopes your kind favoar to catch ; 
I the spark was, dear Clemmy, and you were the Jlatne, 

And between us wc lighted a matcJi ; 

MRS. WHITE.— 'Air — '■'Voidcz vans denser.''' 
Aad don't you remember, Peter, the day, 
When, smartly dresl 
All in our best, 
\\'e IG church rode, joyoa?, gay, 
To be wedded willing ? 

PETER. — (Same Air.) 
i'o.-. I remember well the day, 
When, bjth inclined 
We fast were jin''d 
For I the pareon a guinea did pay, 
Asid the clerk a shilling ! 

BOTH. 

Then to Winsor, in a shay, 
Fiom the church we boul'd away, 

Dashing, 

.Sjilashing, 

Cant'ring, 

Bant'ring, 
On this sweet bridal day. Yee, I rcmeaiber, 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 11 

Mrs. W. (Speahiiir.) And don't you remember, Peter, 
vAml a sweet honeymooti we passed at Greenwich, and 
how you used to take me to Vauxhall, and the Theatres, 
and, above all, to the Opera — the charming Opera? 

I'et. To improve ourselves in the /(exquisite Aarls of 
snging and dancing, by listening to Greasy and Tanibu- 
rnyt and seeing Taggilony and Coolun 'trip it on the light 
fantastic toe.' [Imitativg. 

Mrs. W. And then we used to practise at home, and 
try to imitate them. 

Pet, And very well we did it for Hamateurs. 
BOTH- — Air— "T/ii? Gavotte." 
Lai lal la !. how Greasy like we sing'd it 
Fal lal la ! how laglony liiie we wing'd it — 

One leg here, t'other leg there, 
To be modest pray beware ! 
To obtain the meed of praise, 
Atitude's the thing nowadays, 

[l^hey dance a la Opera. 

Enter Kity Clover /ro?n Cottage, k. h. 

Kit. {Affecting surprise.) Wei!, I declare, if here bea't 
Mr. and Mrs. White ! 

Pet. Yes here we are, nurse loaded with toys for our 
dear little Peter ; not forgetting a lump of sugar and tea 
for you. {Gives iheni.) How is the dear little fellew ? 

Kit. Oil, charuiingj sir; he cat his fii^t tooth yesterday. 

Pet. Bless his little gums. {Crosses c.) That's half a 
crown for you, nuise. [Gives her money. 

Kii> Oh, thank'ee, si."-, I don't say it for inoney^s sake, but 
he's a perfect little nudidUy. [Pocketing the money. 

Pet. Lovely bud of early beauty ! [Delighted. 

Kit- And you ought to be proud of him, sir. 

Pet. I am proud of iiim nurse, wery proud. 

A'tf. Such a sweet temper too: he hasn't cried once 
since — [A Child heard crying within. 

Pet. Eh • what's that ? 

Aif. As sure as fale, now, my little niece has let him 
full I 

Exit R. U' 



22 MR. AND MRS. PETER WlIlfE. 

Pd. Fall! 

Mrs. W. Stupid girl! the dear little fellow may be dis- 
figured for life. [Hurries into cottage. 

Pet, {Follows calUng in a crying ■coke.) Peter I poor 
little Peter ! [Rushes into cottage, r, h, 

^H^er Frank Brown /rowt the. Widow's Cottage. 
Frank. {Walking to and fro.) All is delightfully arranged! 
Clarissa consents to see my uncle under an assumed name, 
and the meeting to appear accidental, as she wisely fears 
that a formal introduction as my intended, would fail to 
conquer his matrimonial prejudices. Now, then, to horse, 
and away to London to meet him, {Looking ovt l, n.) Ah! 
what do I see ! by all that's vexatious, 'tis he himself 1 how 
the deuce did he ferret me out here I— no matter, I must 
brave it out. {Buttons up his Coat^ and ualks towards L. h. 
sjngivg) "Over the hills and far away," 

Enter Major Pepper, meeting htm face to face. 

]\laj. Halt ! front ! stand at ease ! 

FranJc. {effecting astonishment) Eh ! can I believe my 
eyes ? My dear uncle I {Embracing) 1 was hastening to 
town to meet you — Who, in the name of wonder, informed 
you I was here ? 

Maj. Year puppy of a servant, at your chambers in the 
Temple. 

Frank, (aside) The rascal ! after my strict injunctions — 

Muj. At first he was as close as a sentinel with the watch 
v.'ord ; but a sight of this real bamboo soon thaw'd his ton- 
gue. {Shews his cane) 

Frank. {Affecting anger) Stupid fellow! to make such a 
mystery of an innocent ride to Richmond."^* But I'm de- 
lighted to see you, uncle, upon my honour I am ! (Taking 
his hand) And how are you — but I need not ask. You 
look the very picture of health. {With great vivcity.) 

Maj. That's more than you do ; for you look as jaded as 
a soldier on a forced march. What the deuce ails you, eh ? 
you havn'tbeen running into debt have you? 



MR. AND Mas. PETER WH[TK. 15 

Frank. No, uncle, I can't afford it. {smiling.) 

Maj. Not a scrape, eh ? an intrigue, you sly dog. (laus[h 
ing) Tiiere's a woman in the question, I'll be sworn ! Eh I 
I remember now — your last two sheets of foolscap-letter. 
was filled with a description of a Widow Wiggins, or VVIiite 
or some such name, who had cast her magic spells around 
you. But that virtigo is over, I hope ; young people are 
mostly in love once a year from fifteen to thirty, when they 
generally come to the ir senses, as I hope you have. 

Frank. Indeed, uncle, I have not. 

Pep. Eh ? what ! you don't mean to say you are seriously 
infatuated ? 

Frank. Very seriously indeed, uncle ! 

Pep. What! in spite of my counsel I and my example ? 

Franl: I but follow it uncle ; and having had three wives 
yourself, 'tis very unreasonable in you to deny me one! 

Pep. You may jest as you please, sir, but beware I — A 
man may game, intrigue, get over head and ears in debt — 
in short, run the entire round of folly, and yet redeem him- 
self; — bat he is never thoroughly and irreparably undone, 
till he is married — I say it, and I know it — Experientia 
docet. (With great empliasis, knocking his cane on the 
ground.) 

Frank. (With equal warmth and declaiming a la Barister) 
And I say. Gentlemen and Ladies of the jury, in the 
present cause of Matrimony versus Celibacy ; that with all 
its little grievances, man knows no real happiness until he 
is married. Let liiin possess a wife of sense and virtue, 
and of whom he himself is worthy — (mark that point uncle) 
and he will feel a solid and permanent joy of which he was 
never before sensible. Uninterrupted happiness, indeed, no 
man can, or ought to expect. Life, unlike some livings, is 
no sinecure; fruits do not spring spontaneously from the 
earth, as they did in the garden ; nor dees manna drop from 
the clouds as it did in the wilderness — but, despite the ar- 
guments of disappointed old maid« and bachelors, in spite 
o? Malthus and Martineau on population; I assert that, as 
a scheme of solid comfort, matrimony affords, to well regu- 
lated minds, a double share of delight in prosperity, and a 



14 5IR. AND MR?. PETER WKItE. 

solace and support in adversity. (Wiping his forehead imfk 
his handkerchief.) There, answer that, uncle, if you can. 
You can't — so huzza I Matrimony wins the day, ha, ha ! 

Maj. Mad ! mad as a March hare ! ftncies himself 
spouting in Westminster Hall. Love has turned his brain 
— zounds ! I must take him dov^n into Devonshire, 'twill 
be all over with him ! 

Frank, {alarmed) Eh! what? Devonshire, uncle? 

Moj. Yes, where I hope the chanfre of air, and a few 
shower baths, will effectually cool his plagu love fever. 

Frank. Sdeath ! what's to be done now ? {Reflects.) 

Maj, I did intend remaining a few days in town, but for 
your sake we'll be off by the mail this very night. 

Frank, {aside) Egad, it shall be so ; desperate cases 
require desperate measures ! 

Maj. So, quick march ! — Come along to town, and pack 
up your knapsack. 

Fra7ik. {sentimental tone) Alas ! uncle, it cannot, must 
not be ! 

Maj. Indeed ! why not pray ? 

Frank. You are my uncfe — my excellent uncle, and 
the ties of consanguinity are strong ; but my duty to another 
is paramount o'er ail. {Sentimentaly,) 

Maj. Another? 

Frank. Yes, my wife ! {Tnrins aside his head leith affected 
emotion.) 

Pep. Your wife ! why you don't mean to say you are 
married. 

Frank. I am, indeed, uncle 1 (Rapidly and emphatically.) 
I know the full extent of my disobedience to your com- 
mands, but, hurried on by the impetuo.^ily of youth, the 
violence of my passion, the— the— and dispairing to obtain 
your consent 

Pep. You have made an ass of yourself! And who, 
pray, is Mrs. Brown ? 

Frank, Mrs. White, who, for the present, however, re- 
tains her name, as she wishes, for family reasons, to keep 
our union a eecvet. (Placing Imhandon the Majoi'^s shoulder") 
And 1 am assured you will bury it in the inmost recessess 
of your affectionate bosom. (Turns aside to laugh.) 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. J 5 

Pep. Nonsense ! I won't believe if. Come, com?, mas- 
ter F'rank, j'oa are actin;^ your part extremely well, but it 
won't do. We old soldiers are not so easily caught. You 
want to w'needle me out of my consent, but it won't do, i 
tell you, Iia, ha! 

Frank. {A^ide) Sdeath ! he suspects 

Pep. Ha, ha ! I wonder yon didn't work it np stronger, 
by swearing that a sweet little offspring had crown'd your 
handy work. It would have bctn a very natural consC' 
quence, you know, ha, hal 

FrarjJc. (aside) Egad, and it shall be so. Alas ! you now 
touch upon a tender chord. (Aloud.) 

Pep. Tender fiddlestick! (Frank nighs — IaIajor Icoks 
alanned.) Eh ? why — why, you don't mean to say you are 
really. (At this moment the child is heard crjiing in Kitty 
Clowek's cottage.) Eh? what the devil's that? (Frank. 
^pretending to be deeplp affected^ points to the cottage^ and 
places his hand, upon his heart, exclaiming sentimentally.) 

Frank. Pardon me, uncle — but the voice of nature ; my 
feelings are so overcome, tliat I must withdraw for a few 
moments. (Going'— child cries again) Poor babe! (Half 
aside) Cutting its little dog tooth ! [Fxitinto l. h. house 
laughing. 

Pep. If it sliould be all true ! (Going to cottage stops) Oh 
here comes a wench, she can tell something about the mat- 
ter, perhaps. 

Enter Kitty Clover hastily, n. h. 

Kit. I wonder if Mr. Brown be gone yet. (Stop', seeing 
the Major.) 

Pep. So, so, she knows him. (Aside) PTark'ee young 
woman. (Aloud) Didn't I hear a child crying just now? 

Kit. Mayhap you might. Some folks ears are long 
enough for anythinsf. 

Pep. Who does it; belong to ? 

Kit. Its father and mother, to be sure, (aside) What an 
inquisitive old gentleman ! 

Pep. And who are they ? 

Kit. Ciin'ttell! 



16 MR. AND MRS.PKTKR WHITE. 

Pep. How so ? 

Kit. Because I musn't 

Pep. Why not? 

Ii.it Can you keep a secret ? (Mysteriously) 

Pep. Yes. (Getting close to her.) 

Kit. So can I ! (laughs) Ha, ha ! you thought lo pump I, 
because I be country bred. But la bless you, sir, there be 
as many fools in Lunnun as in the country, as you must 
know. (Going) 

Pep. But listen 

Kit. I can't; there be Mrs. White calling I- (Rrins in 
io Cotivge.) 

Pep. Mrs. White! its all true then! that name confirms 
the melancholy fact. The hypocritical scoundrel! I'll 
disinherit, and leave him nothing but his wife, and if she 
proves like any one of the three late Mrs. Peppers, he'll ba 
pretty well punished, I think. (Walks to and fro.) 

Enter Peter WHiTE,/rom Cottage^ r. h. 

Pet. (Strutting about with his hands in his pockets) Wb^-t 

dear little feller ! nurse says he's the picture of me : ha 
ha ! lovely Ainfant! — happy father ! 

Pep, (asidc'—hekind.) What strutting bantem cock is 
hs, I wonder ? He came from the cottage — one of Mrs, 
White's friends, I suppose. 

PeN (In front to himself^ We'll have him vaccinated 
next week, and christened on my birth day, the First of 
April: and ecod ! a rare jolification we'll have of it. He's 
wery fair, tho' for a boy, I wish he was a little more ftroton ; 
it looks manly ! 

Pep. (advancing) Eh ? Brown ! he knows Frank, (meet- 
ing Peter face to face) What's that you say, sir ? 

Pet. (Looking up at him.) Eh ? say ? why I suppose 
I'm at liberty ro speak of my dear little — godson? (Aside) 
Ecod ! I was near letting the cat out of the bag. 

Pep. And are you god-father to the brat? 

Pet. Brat ! come I say, old gentleman ! and what then, 
pray ? 

Pep. What then ? why you ought to be ashamed of 
yourself. 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 17 

Pet. Ashamed of myself ! for what ? 

Pep. Why, for aiding and abetting in such a disgrace- 
ful transaction; 

Pet. Disgraceful ? [Aside.] What does the old codger 
mean? 

Pep. Aye. [Emphatically, JcnocHng his cain on the 
ground,] Do you know to whom the child belongs, sir? 

Pet. I should think so. 

Pep. Do you know it's father ? 

Pet. I suspect so. [Conceitedly. 

Pep. And so do I, sir. 

Pet. Wory likely ! [Aside.] I dgu't remember his phisi- 
ology, though. 

Pep, And I repeat, sir, that it is the offspring of a clan- 
destine, unlawful union. 

Pet. Unlawful ! 

Pep. Yes, sir, contracted without my knowledge or 
consent. 

Pet. {Aside.) His consent ! that's good anyhow. 

Pep. In short, sir, 'tis my nephew's child. 

Pet.( Laughing.) Your nephew's ! ha, ha! a capital 
joke, faith. {Aside.) Some wag has been hoaxing the old 
gudgeon, {Aloud.) And who told you so, eh ? ha, ha ! 

[Laughing. 

Pep. My nephew himself to be sure. 

Pet. {Slill laughing.) Your nephew himself, ch ? ha, 
ha ! where and when, pray ? 

Pep. Here! 

Pet. Here? 

Pep. On this very spot, not five minutes ago. 

Pet. (Getting alarmed.) Eh! what? 

Pep. So you see I know all about the clandestine mar- 
riage, and Mrs. White. 

Pet. {More alarmed.) Mrs. White ! {Aside.) A horrid 
thought flashes on my brain. {Aloud.) And your nephew's 
name is 

Pep. Brown, 

Pet. Brown! [Starting. 

Pep. Pshaw ! you know it as well as I do I 

Pet. {Aside.) the dandy perfumer, by all that's horrific! 



lb MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

This then accounts for the sjjiell f Lavender water I 
[Reels against Pepper, who supports him. 

Pep. What does all this mean ! {Shaking him) Sir ! — 
IMr. What's your name ? 

Pet. (Aside — recovering.) -My head- turns round like a 
teetotun). {Tragically) This then, accountsTor her agita- 
tions whenever his name was mentioned. And I'll have 
deep, dreadful, deadly reparation ! Both — both shall feel a 
/iinjured husband's t^jengeance ! 

Pep. What the deuce ails him ? is he mad 1 

Pet. {Rushing vp to him.) Heark'ee old genfZeman, do 
you know what Othello says ? 

Pep, Not I. 

Pet. {Clenching his hands ut him.) "See that thou 

prov'st Mrs. White a — -you know what or thou 

had'st better have been born a dog, Inoro — a dog — a dog — 
dog ? '[Striding to and fro. 

Pep. Poor fellow ! I suppose he's subject to these fit.". 

Pet, {Rushing towards the cottage,) fla! the comes ! 

Prp. Who? Mrs. White! 

Pet. {Wildly.) Yes, that's her, and I am done — Brown 
— Brown — Brown ! [Strikes his forehead and rushes out 
above u. e. r. ii. 

Pep. Mad ! mad as a Bedlamite ! 

Enter. Mrs. Whlte, from n. ti. Cottage. 

Mrs. Vi. {Calling after Peter.) Peter, Peter, where are 
you going 7 We bhall be too late for the Ooinibus I 

Pep. {Aside — in fitont looking at her.) What, is this the 
woman Frank said was all loveliness and gentility .' A 
pretty taste he has got. {Aloud blunthj.) Heark'ee, 
madam I 

Mrs. W- {Astonished,) Sir! 

Pep. You and I must have a little talk together before 
you go. 

Mrs. W. A little talk together. Really, Sir, I havn't 
the pleasure to i?now you. 

Pep. But I know you, madam, and I blush for you ; fie, 
madam ! a woman at your time of life! 

Mrs. W. At my time of life ! what do you mean, sir? 
I don't understand you, sir ? 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. ]D 

Pep. Oh, you need not afFect ignorance in this, or any 
other matter, madam. I know all ! 

Mrs. W. What do you mean, sir? — you speak ■pnrrcgo- 
rically ! 

Pep. Your clandestine marriage, ma'am .' — and the 
littie ofFspring-, ma'am ! 

Mrs. TV. {Aside.) Oh, gracious goodness ! is piir secret 
discovered? {Aloudy agitated) Marr'mge, siv i may I ask 
who your FCindLilous informer is ? 

Pep. Your husband himself, m;i'am. 

Mrs. W. Myhusbrind! (asit/e) Peter shall sm^t for thi?. 
(Aloud) Well, sir, and if I am marrieci, what affairs is it of 
yours, pray ? 

Pep. 'Sdeath ma'am, I'm your husband's uncle. 

Mrs. W. His uncle ! whatj are you old Mr. Tittlebat the 
fishmonger of Brumagen ? 

Pep. Fishmonger? — fidd'edee ! 

Mrs. W. Really, sir, this language 

Pep. Zounds, madam, do you suppose I can take such a 
ma'ter coolly ? I'll disinherit the puppy, if it's only for the 
falsehoods he told me about you. 

Mrs. W. Fulsehood, Mr. Tittlebat? 

Pep. Yes, he swore you were the bean ideal of loveliness 
and gentility! 

Mrs. W. {Conceitedly) Well, sir, and am 1 rot 

Pep. You certainly are not, madam ! But 'tis not your 
fault. You are not accountable for the defects of nature 
and education ! 

Mrs. \V. (Famiincr herself) Oh, dear ! I can't support it 
— I shall faint— I know. I shall 1 

Maj. {Coolu., Without lookiiirr at her) You are at full liber- 
ty to act as you think proper, ma'am. % ■ 

Mrs. W. Oh, oh — I'ln'^going— I'm going 

Maj. {Not looking) Well, go, ma'au), gn ! 

Mrs. W. Oh ! oh 1 {Sinks rtpon /iiw, so that he is compel- 
led to Support her .) 

Maj. 'Sdeath 1 {alovd to 7<e))Ma'am ! ma'am ! can't you 
postpone it till you get in doors, ma'am ? {At this moment 
Peter White appears on the hill behind — his cravat lOOsened 



20 MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

and hh whole appearance disordered. Perceiving Jiis Wife 
in the Major's arms, he appcrs horror-struck^ strikes his fore- 
head, and rushes out again, exclaiming " Brown I Brown !') 

Mrs. W. (Starling up suddenly from the Major's arms.) 
You're a brute ! a monster ! But expect my husband to 
avenge these insults, sir I [Hurries into Cottage, R. H. 

Pep. Wliat a X iniippe ! a perfect Sycorax ! 

Enter Frank Brown, l, h. 

Frank. (Gaily) Well, my dear uncle, I hope you are a 
little more calm now. 

Pep. Calm ! no, sir, I'm in a perfect hurricane of pas. 
sion! Hearkee, sir — do you persist in saying that Mrs 
White is perfeclicn personified ? 

Frank. I do ? 

Pep. Then bless your taste, say I ! I have seen her, sir 

Frank. Seen her ? 

Pep. Yes, and the figure of fun, your child's godfather. 

Frank. My child's godfitiier I (smothering a laugh.) 

Pep. Yes, and the sooner you confine him in Bedlam the 
belter 

Frank, (aside) Egad, there must be some mistake here. 
(Aloud, and suj>prcssingliis laughter.) Sj you have seen 
ihem uncle — fnay I ask wlierc ? 

Pep. Wliy, here, to be sure. They came from the 
nurse's coltaga, little suspecting I was here to confound 
them— and I must say that your Mrs. White is — ahem ! 

Frank (aside) I see it all now — it must bj the other 
Mrs. White and her husband. Egad, 'tis a rare joke : and 
if I can only persuade them to keep it up for a time 

Pep. So, sir, as you have thought propper thus to disobey 
me, you must t ilce the consequence — I have done with you, 
sir. 

Frank. Nay, uncle 

Pep. (Walking to and fioin anger) Not a word, sir — I 
have done wiih you for ever— for ever I (The Widow sings 
at thi^ moment within— she signs to Frank and retires from 
door.) 

Frank. (Aiide, moving towards Cottuge^n. h.) Now for 
the tact of my dear Widow to manage him, Meantime 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 21 

I'll go and explain all to Kitty and the' other Mrs, White, 
and try to gain their assistance. 

[Exit irtto Cottage r. h^ 
Pep. {walking to and fro in front) What a dolt was I to 
leave Devonshire on such an errand, and in the very heart 
of the coursing season! {Stops on hearing the Wmow dng 
inside the Cottage.) 

Enter Widow, from House, l. h. 

SONG. WIDOW. 

Let others dwell in stately hall, 

And feast 'neath golden canopy . 
But let me dwell where torrents brawl. 
And Zephyrs stir the greenwood tree. 
Where the hunter's horn, 
At peep of moon. 
Comes echoing wild and merrily ; 
And the red deer bound, 
O'er the gleeby gound, ' 

And the mountain lark sings cherrilv. 
Tallyho ! Tallyho ! 

Pep. {delighted) Tallyho! ho! bravo — admirably sung' 
— I could almost fancy myself coursing in Devonsliire. I 
wonder who the fair singer is. A rare wench — one alter 
iny own heart I 

Wid. (singing) Tallyho ! {Pretending to know him) Ha, 
Sir Guy Fox — come like a true cavalier to escort me to — ■ 
(Here the Major turns to her, and she affects surprise.) A 

stranger I declare ! a thousand pardons, my dear, sir 

[curtseys. 
Pep. What a splendid creature ! (Aloud, bowing.) Nay, 
madam, 'tis I, rather, who should apologize for slopping 
to listen to your song, which accords so well with my taste 
and habits. 

Wid. You are a sportsman, then, I presume, sir. 
Pep. Yes, madam, heart and soul — although a soldier 
by profession. 



22 MR. MUD MR3. PETER WHITE. 

Wid. (gaily.) 'Nay, the professions are somewhat alike 
— both carry arms, and are licenced to kill — allhoagh you 
doubtless, tiiink wilii me, sir, that shooting game is the 
more pardonable p-i.-time'. 

Pe/>. Right, madam, right! (aside) Egad, she's as witty 
as Bhe''s beautiful. If that rascal Frank, had but chosen 
such a woman 

Wid. I, too, am enraptured with the sports of the -fitld, 
and delight in the pleasures of the chase. 'Twas but last 
week I rode a day's sport after twenty couple of hounds — 
staunch tartars as ever barked or run a course-— took a fly- 
ing leap across a stream — dashed through two quicksets, 
and leaped three five-barred gates I 

Pep. (pleased, and following her in action in her descrip- 
tion.) Bravo ! 

Wid. We started Reynard before.eight— had a view hol- 
low by ten — tuUyho, ho, ho ! 

Pep. (delighted.) Tally ho I hark forward I wind him, 
the villian — wind him I 

Wid. At eleven he took to the water — we plunged after 
— crossed the Thames 

Pep. That's your sort, neck or nothing — yoicks I 

Wid. Up the hill — down the valley — over hedge, ditch, 
and gate we go, helter skelter. At twelve the whole pack 
close in with him — you might cover them with a table 
cloth 

Pep. (with action) Beautiful — beautiful ! 

Wid. And we killed him exactly at nineteen minul&s, 
three seconds after one. 

Pep. Bravo, bravo ! Why, madam, you're a perfect 
Diana ! 

Wid. Then at angling, I can kill a trout or salmon with 
a single hair — and at shooting, strike the spot out of an ace 
of diamonds. 

Pep. (delighted) You don't say so, madam! 

Wid. And at driving a phaeton — drive four hunters from 
London to Bath without once losing tlie whip hand of the 
road, and turn them out on the breadth of a shilling's 
edge ! 



MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 23 

Pep. Why, you're a perfect Olympic charioteer, madam 
— {aside) Zuunds, with such a wife, a man might win a 
fortune in wagers ! 

Wid. {aside, laughing) Frank told me his humour, and 
1 flatter myself I have hit it. {To Major) And no>v, sir, 
may I ask, do you reside in this part of the country? 

Pep. Mo, madam, my estate is in Devonshire, where I 
should now be enjoying the delightful sport you liLive so 
admirably described, but for a hair-brained nephew of njine 
who has brought mc up to London, where I find he has 
taken it into his silly head to get married. 

Wid, Ah, I understand — a clandestine union. — {Aside) 
— Frank did not tell me he had gone so far ! 

Pep. What think you, madam, of such conduct ? 
Wid. 'Tis highly censurable, no doubt.: but love, you 
know, is a sad tempter to disobedience, {Sentimentally, 
gazing at him.) 

Pep. {Aside.) Oh lord, 1 can't stand it — zooks, whit a 
pair of eyes! they're positively unnerving. {Aloud.) Kow, 
had he selected one like yourself, madam, he would have 
had every excuse in his favour. (^Bowing.) 
Wid. {Curtseying) Oh, sir, you- — -• 
Fep. Or liad 1 been as fortunate with either of my 
three wives i 

Wid. Three wives I what a bold man you must be ! 
Pep. Egad, so used my comrades to say — for in matri- 
mony, as in war, I always volunteered for the forlorn hope. 
Wid. Ha, ba 1 {Looking out.) Bless me ! a heavy shower 
of rain appears to be coming on — will you accept the shel- 
ter of my Hermit'ige until 'tis over? Although 1 am not 
quite sure I ought to trust myself with a gentleman who 
has had three wives. {Laughingly) 

Pep. {Briskly.) Egad, if I was fortunate enough to find 
a fourth like yourself, madam, I'd make a quartette of it 
tomorrow — 1 \\ould, by Jupiter — ahem! [Exeunt into 
Collage, the Major handing her in courteously a la militaire 
singing " When the heart of a man is depress'd by care," 
Sfc. during xohich Frank and Kittt are seen peeping at them 
from the door of the opposite Cottage. They come doun. 



24 MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

Fraiik. Bravo I the old sportsman is fairly trapped at 
last! 

Kit. Yes, he be captivated, Mr. Brown, sure enough. 
No fools, like old fools I [Exit into Collage r. h. 

Enter Vkvzk, meeting "Fr^-sk^v. e. r. h. — Frank r. h. 

Pet. (slartirig) Ha! Brown, did she say? {striding up 
to Frank.] Is your name Brown, sir ? 

Frank. It is, sir. 

Pet. Then you're a wjillian ! 

Frank, [affecting anger] Sir, that's a hard word ! 

Pet. Hard or soft, I repeat it. Fire and fuiy, sir, an't 
you afeard I should /lannihilate you on the spot ? [Frank 
smiles.] Mr?. White, sir — Mrs. White! [Stamping,] 

Frank. And what hnve you to do with that lady, eh, 
sir? — [Affecting anger.] 

Pet. [Laughing wildly.] Ha, ha, ha ! hear this, ye gods ! 
[Bitterly] Yon love her — you know you do ! 

Frank. [Following Peter, ivko retreats] Dare you pre- 
sume to question my right to love her ? You're a rival, I 
suppose? 

Pet. I should think I am ! 

Frank. Pshaw ! don't make a fool of yourself! [Tarns 
from him and walks to and fro.] 

Pet. [Following him about closely.] But, sir 

Frank. Nonsense I 

Pet. I am 

Franh 'Rediculous! [Still walking.] 

Pet. [Following] I'll have satisfaction, sir — I say satis- 
faction, sir — there's my card, sir I [Trusts it over Frank's 
shoulder — Frank ttops suddenly, takes Peters^s card, places 
it on the palm of his hand, and blows it into Peter's face, ex- 
claiming '^Pho V^ aiid laughing aside.] 

Pet. [Beioildered.] The world's at an end, and chaos is 
come again 1 But I'll have vengeance — I'll raise the 
whole neighbourhood— All Europe shall know a //injured 
husband's wrongs ! [Ascends the Stage calling] Hollo! 
everybody — murder— thieves — abduction — seduction — and 
prttty larceny I 



MR. AND MRS. tETER WHIT?. 25 

Enter hastily from both. Cottages, Major Pepper ancZ Kittv 

Pep. Eh— what's the matter ? 

Pet. [ Wildhj\ Ha, ha ! I have you both now. [Seizins: 
the Major by the collar with his left hand.] You are the old 
or\e what told me of it — [Seizing Frank with the right 
hand.] — and you are the young one that did it. [Frank 
laughs, Peter shaking him by the collar.] 

Pep. What the deuce is the meaning 

Pet. [catting] What ho! Mr. White— Mrs. White- 
come forth, I say — [//ere f/ie Widow and Mrs. White enter 
hastily from the two Cottages.] 

Wid and Mrs. W. [together] Here I am [Short pause. 

Peter releases the Mi jo r and Frank, and rushes towards his 
Wtfe, then pauses suddenly, looks at her, and exclaims in a 
sentimental tone. 

Pet. Oh, Clementina, have I deserved this of you ? [strik- 
ing his forehead] 

Mrs. W. Nay, my dear Peter 

Pet. [Averting his head.] Away ! away I <' Go to a nuu» 
nery — go I — go l" — 

Mrs. W. 'Tis all a mistake, Peter, I assure you. 

Kit. It be, indeed, sir — come this way, and I'll tell you 
all about it. [Kitty and Mrs. White endeavour to lead him 
away — he puts them aside and walks toicards the back striking 
his forehead and geticulating. They follow and appear to he 
explaining the affair to him, while Pepper, Frank, and the 
Widow remain in front conversing.'] 

Pep. [to Frank] There, there, you may spare your pains, 
young gentleman, the widow has confessed all ; and 'tis 
lucky for you that you have so fair an excuse for the de- 
ception you have practised on me. 

Frank. May I then hope to be forgiven ? 

Wid. Nay, that 'vas our condition. Major, was it not ? 
[Placing her hand upon his arm.] and a soldier's word is his 
bond. 

Pep. Zooks ! there is no resisting that bewitching smile, 
— There, take her, Frank. If I had such a prize in view 

should certainly 



26 MR. AND MRS. PETER WHITE. 

Wid. {Laughingly.] Complete the quartette of the Mrs, 
Peppery — eh Major >. 

Pep, Ha ! ha I Go to, you're a Syren. 

Wid. A very Widow-, eh, Major ? [Laughing then looking 
totoards Peier, Sfc] So, it seems my namesake and her 
spouse are friends again. [Peter, Mrs. While, and Kilty 
advance. ] 

Pet. \Laughlng^ Ecod — 'tis a comical mistake ! But I 
was preciously frightened tho' ! so, there are two Mrs. 
Whites, — and you are not the Dandy Perfumer after all. 

[To Frank.] 

Frank. No indeed, sir ! but I have to apologize to your 
good lady for the liberty I took in making her my wife for 
an hour. 

Mr?.. W. No apology, Sir, I beg — 'twas rather a compli 
ment than a liberty ! (Curtseying, then aside.) What a 
liandsome fellow ! 

P(i. ( To Frank.) Well, I never bear malice ; so there's 
my hand j and what's more, I ipvite you to my son's 
christening.— Dear little fellow, you shall see him. 

[Runs into Cottage r, h. 

Pep. (Delighted.) Frank, you're a lucky dog, and if 
you dun't make such a wife happy, you deserve to be made 
the Jiiost miserable husband in Christendom. 

Frank. Trust me, uncle, I know the value of the treasure 
I am about to possess. (At this moment Peter White 
Enters from the Cottage, carrrying in his arms a child in 
long clothes.) 

Pel. (Coming down t. h.) Ladies and gentlemen, allow 
me the pleasure of introducing to you Master Peter, my son 
i.nd licir, who will, with your permisssion, when able to 
spout, have the honour of making you a speech, and return 
you his respectful thanks for your kind reception of his Pa ! 
and Ma ! 



THE CURTAIN FALLS. 



TURNER'S DRAMATIC LIBRARY. 



ITherese, 

• iJ Dead Shot, 

• 3 Hamlet, 

' 4 Chimney Piece, ^ 

•S Clari, - 

•6 Dumb Belle, 

• 7 Unfinished Gent, 

• 8 Golden Farmer, 
- y John Jones, 

10 Uncle Sam 

11 Tom Cringle,-^ 

12 Hunting a Turtle, 

13 Provost of Bruges, 

14 Wandering Minstrel,' 

15 Richard HI, 

16 Man about town, 

17 My Uncle John, 

18 The Seven Clerks, 

19 Lucille, 

20 Douglass, 

21 Review, 

22 Ugolino 

23 P. P, 

24 Mummy, 

25 Wrecker's Daughter, 

26 Bottle Imp, 

27 Flight to America,-^ 

28 Wahace, 

29 Omnibus, 

30 Damon and Pythias, 

31 Gladiator. 

32 Pickwick Club, 

33 Love Chase 

34 Pizarro, 

35 Othello, 

36 La Sonnambula, 

37 Lady of Lyons, 

38 Athenian Captive, 

39 Woman's Wit, 

40 The Irish Lion, 

41 The Spitfire. 

42 St. Patrick's Eve, 

43 Rory O More, 

44 The Ransom, 



' 45 Pleasant Neighbours, 

•46 Maid of Mariendorpt, 

-47 Tom Noddy's Secret, 

. 48 The Stranger, 

.49 Ion, 

«50 Richelieu, •• 

•51 Virginius, 

•52 Sea Captain, 

•53 Love, 

•54 Maid of Florence,^ 

•55 John Di Procida 

•56 Old Maids, 

•57 Cinderella, 

^58 Fra Diavlo, 

'59 Money, 

• 60 London Assurance, 
*61 Hunchback, 

'62 School for Scandal, 

'63 Apostate, 

' 64 Venice Preserved 

'65 Iron Chest, 

'66 The Bridal,-^ 

•67 Love in Humble Life, 

*68 Raising the Wind, 

• 69 Swiss Cottage, 
'70 Nipped in the Bud, 

1 71 Perplexing Predicament 

• 72 Did you ever send your ^ 

Wife to Brooklyn, 
'73 Floating Beacon, 

• 74 The Maid of Croissy. 
•75 The Mother and Child ' 

are doing well. 
'76 Luke the Labourer. 
«77 Brazen Drum, 
' 78 Village Lawyer. 
'79. Maurice, the Wood- 
cutter. 
'80 Rake's Progress, 
'81 Willful Murder, 

• 82 Ambrose Gwinett, 

' 83 Idiot Witness, — -v" 
■ Mr. and Mrs. White ^ 



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